Thereโs a lot of talk about the first year of marriageโand for good reason. The first year of marriage is bothย notoriously difficultย and exciting, so it feels like a big adventure, albeit a sometimes difficult one. But once that first year of marriage is done, you still have a lot more of your married life ahead of you. So after you celebrate your first anniversary as a married couple, itโs a great time to pause and take stock of your relationship.
Because even though marriage is rewarding and exhilarating, itโs also workโa lot of work. So much so that about 20 percent of marriagesย end within the first five years. Thatโs not to scare youโmostย marriages make it well beyond there. But itโs an important reminder not to get complacent. Once the wedding gifts are opened and theย thank you notes are all signed, itโs easy to fall into a relationship laziness. And while itโs good to feel comfortable and settled, itโs a slippery slope toย feeling complacentย and even to taking each other for granted. So when youโve reached the one-year-mark, itโs time to take a moment and relish in your happily married life, but also to plan for the future and make sure that things are still rolling along. Here's what you should do to keep your relationship strong.
Find Excuses to Laugh
Laughter is so important in a relationship, and not just during those early days of courtship. Humor helps keep a marriage alive. In fact, research fromย University of North Carolina at Chapel Hillย found that couples who laugh together felt more supportive and reported having higher quality relationships. Whether you go to comedy nights, watch your favorite TV shows, or just laugh at each other as you dance around your kitchen like fools, itโs so crucial that youย take the time to laugh togetherโhard and often.
Plan Your Date Nights
Once the initial shineโand stressโof married life has finally worn off, you may feel like you just need a break. And taking some time to rest and reset is totally normal. But after youโve had a year to get back to normality, itโs time to make sure that youโre still nurturing your relationship and each other.ย Make time for date nights, to travel and just to check in throughout the day. Even after you're married, you should still feel like youโre dating and wooing your partnerโitโs a great way to keep your marriage strong.
Touch Base About the Future
You probably had a lot of plans that you were going to get toย onceย you were married. Once you got through the wedding maybe you were going to save for a house or plan a trip around the world or start getting ready to have kids. Itโs easy, once youโve relaxed into married life, to let those deadlines slowly slip away. While choosing to postpone things is fine, falling into apathy and letting the time run away from you isnโt. So make sure you touch base about thoseย big future plansย and make sure youโre both on the same page.
Find a New Hobby
One of the best ways to strengthen your relationship is to do something new together. Learning a new skill, trying a new hobbyโanything thatโs out of the ordinary helps you create new memories, see each other in a new light, and is often a great chance for the two of you to laugh at each other while you navigate something youโre not particularly good at. So go to a pilates class, try pottery, or even lose the map and get lost somewhere new.
Sort Out Your Finances
If you got into the red during your wedding planningโit happens, these thingsย alwaysย go over budgetโnow is the time to take a long hard look at your finances. Many couples donโt actuallyย join financesย until after theyโre marriedโand itโs easy to keep procrastinating and putting off this very important talk. But now that youโre married and things have had time to settle, you should sit down, look at your goals for the future, and come up with a financial game plan to help you achieve those dreams.
Set Aside Phone-Free Time
Phone-free time isย crucial for every relationship, but itโs especially important once youโve been married a while. The longer youโve been together the easier it is to let your phone creep out over dinner, while youโre watching TV, or even in the middle of talking to your spouse. Though it may seem harmless because everybody does it, it can actually create a huge amount of distance between you and your partner, so make sure that you have time without any screens distracting you.
Say Thank You More
Finally, a year into married life, make sure that youโre still saying, โThank you.โ It may be through saying the exact words or it may be through taking the time to tell your partner how amazing they are, how much they mean to you, and how important your relationship is. It may be through gifts or hugsโeveryone shows gratitude differently. The important thing is that youโre showing it.